A relative once assumed my five-year-old could already read chapter books on her own. She couldn’t yet. What stung wasn’t the comment itself – it was how quickly I second-guessed myself before remembering that was completely normal for her age.
That wasn’t the only thing I got wrong at five and six with my oldest. Looking back, most of it came from the same root mistake.
Assuming Readiness That Wasn’t There Yet
I let one offhand comment about chapter books put doubt in my head about a kid who was doing exactly what five-year-olds do. The mistake wasn’t hers to fix – it was mine, for briefly trusting someone else’s assumption over what I could actually see in front of me.
Sitting Beside for Too Long
I also sat beside my kids for everything straight through kindergarten, well past the point where some of that closeness could have started loosening. It wasn’t until six or seven that I began deliberately stepping away – folding laundry nearby, checking in instead of hovering. With my oldest, I held on to the hovering longer than she needed me to.
What I Do Differently Now
Now, at five and six, I watch more than I assume, and I let go of proximity earlier than feels comfortable, on purpose. Both changes came from getting it wrong once and paying enough attention to notice.
Having a clearer sense of what five and six actually call for would have saved me both mistakes – it’s exactly the kind of thing I mapped out in The Age-by-Age Learning Roadmap.
Our Ages hub covers this stage and the one right after it, if you’re in the thick of it now.
